Emotions & Sex

It's become clear that these are two things that i cannot seem to distinguish from each other. This is dangerous.

"Elvis isn't dead cos I heard him on the radio..."

I seem to find myself in a slight bit of dilemma... I seem to have forged a fascination for the Kiwi. Which is not good as I have not really had a sober conversation with him... Awkward.

"Alter the Ending"

2 months later and I'm still in a state of flux. A LOT of things has happened since then though. In the spirit of keeping things concise, here's a summary:

• Bitchboy and I haven't spoken since we called off the "fun times"
• except when we're both drunk - however I remained sensible and said "No"
• The Awards party was fun, if not eventful.
• Bitchboy tried it on, I walked away
• Straight into the snogging lips of The Kiwi who was conveniently waiting
• The Kiwi offered to take me home which I kindly declined (not for any other reason apart from the fact that the crimson tide was due and that's just weird.)
• Bitchboy still tried to get it on when leaving the club
• I remained sensible.
• I had my very first "proper" one night stand with the Mountie
• Random stranger
• Even randomer location
• Bruised. Everywhere. I like things rough, but the bruises that resulted after that night just takes the biscuit
• I'm embarrassed about my actions (especially as it was VERY public) but I don't regret it - life experience and all that jazz - it's not like I'll ever see him again. Although I do remember telling him to call me when he's back from his travels... hmm.
• The Mountie added me on Facebook - awkward
• The Kiwi and I are in avoidance
• The Bitchboy is dickhead
• My job is in a phase of transition

Perhaps the most notable event of the last couple months is:

THE LION KING!

Ok, sad I know, BUT hear me out - I've been wanting to see the show since it first came out and when my friend mentioned that she wanted to see it I said "OOOH, let's go!" This was on a Tuesday lunchtime, by Tuesday 4pm, the tickets were booked and my friend and I were transformed from respectable 20somethings  to the blubbering excitable 13-14 year olds of years yonder time. I have never clapped and screamed in excitement so much in my life... There was a fear that I may have built the show up to be better than what it should be but I am happy to report that the show EXCEEDED my expectations and more!! It was totally awesome. AWESOME I tell you.  GO see it. 

Anyway. I'm working to get the Kiwi. This could be interesting as he's very shy and well, I'm not. 

Laters! 

"These are the thngs that make me free; I feel like I'm stuck in 'Stand by Me'"

Yesterday, a momentous thing happened - Bitchboy and I decided to call it quits with our drunken encounters. A few text messages and IM's later it was decided that we are better off as friends with former benefits. Apparently he felt a bit 'wrong' afterwards. Nice. Mind you, I did say I felt weird.

Which is fine, really.

...If the heart didn't decide to suddenly form some sort of attachment to Bitchboy. 

He admitted to liking someone else (we'll call her Pixie)  - good for him. Funnily enough, the person he likes tried it on with my brother. Awkward. 

We promised to be friends. In theory, it would work but in practice it really is quite difficult. I saw him hanging around Pixie and the beating ticker within my chest cavity suddenly decided to feel like it broke into a thousand pieces - it's not a nice feeling and quite difficult to bear in an occupational environment. I'm not sure what the ticker is telling me but it sure is starting to ache and I'm pretty sure that intense jealousy is at the heart of it...

Friendships are a fickle thing. Perhaps even more fickle than the weather. Fickle is a funny word is it not?